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[swatsflies]

@ZD
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((OOC: Zell may show messages to Jim Hawkins. If you do not want Jim to see/know, then please let me know.))

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[swatsflies]

[ Al can probably guess it's news from the sound of a sharp inhale. It feels like a punch in the gut, and it takes a moment to figure out how to word. ]

Frickin' hell. I...I'm sorry, Al. [ Making a frustrated noise as he rubbed the back of his head. ] What happened?

[armoured]

It was an anomaly.

[Another one, this is too many times that he's had to watch people that he cares about dragged away, helpless to stop it.]

I tried to-- I-- But I couldn't do anything.

[swatsflies]

[ What's even the right thing to say? He knows he can't say it's okay. He knows it's never going to be okay, even when you get someone back. Swallowing back his own emotions to do his best for Al. ]

I know. I know you did your best. [ He says it with certainty. ] I know you, Al. I know you would have done everything you could have.

[armoured]

[There's a very long pause, and when Al's response come it's in a muted voice, devoid of any of the hope that's usually there.]

But it wasn't enough.

YOUR SPIKE WILL BE THE SPIKE TO PIERCE THE HEAVENS, AL!

[swatsflies]

[ He places his hand on tablet as he heaves a heavy sigh. ]

I know it sucks. And it feels pretty shitty that it keeps happening. [ Curling up his hand into a fist. ] We just have to fix this frickin' place. Give it back it's power so it can bring everyone back. We'll make it happen, Al.

[armoured]

No!

[It's immediate and horrified.]

That's-- that's the last thing we should be trying to do. I know we miss the people that are gone, but bringing them back from the dead isn't right. It's not-- it's not natural, Zell, we shouldn't be trying to get all of them back.

[swatsflies]

[ Whoa. He's taken aback by the reaction for a moment. ]

What's wrong with it? If we can save them... if we can save everyone, why shouldn't we try? [ Please explain, armor bro. ]

[armoured]

Because it's not saving them, they're--- they're already gone, Zell. You don't know what bringing them back does to them, or the world, you can't just do that.

AND I THOUGHT I HIT SUBMIT FOR THIS TWO DAYS AGO

[swatsflies]

What if they aren't gone? What if there is still hope? I'm going to do whatever I can to find out, Al. I'm not giving up on any of them.

I hate when that happens!

[armoured]

It's not giving up to understand when it's time to let someone go!

[Oops, that comes out as a shout.]

[swatsflies]

Not going to let them go if there is a way to save them.

[ He's not yelling, but it's clear he's being stubborn. Huffing out a breath. ] I'm going to do it, Al.

[armoured]

You're an idiot, Zell!

[This is probably the first time that he's lost his temper with one of his friends, at least properly, and he can't help how livid he sounds.]

You don't understand how dangerous it is to even try that, you don't know what the price is! You can't-- You're an idiot!

It'll cost you an arm and a leg

[swatsflies]

How is it dangerous?! Tell me, Al? What kind of price wouldn't be worth it?

[ Why does it sound like Al has been there before? ]

wow rude

[armoured]

[He makes a choked sound in the back of his throat, but he can't just let Zell carry on this way. He has to tell.]

Nature needs balance, Zell, bringing a life back needs an equivalent price paying. But there isn't a price for a human soul, not really, it just hurts everyone to try and pretend that's not so. Please, you have to trust me, nobody should ever come back from the dead no matter how much you miss them.

[swatsflies]

A price? What kind of price? [ It's not that he doesn't trust Al, but it just it's hard to swallow it when they are right there in the morgue. And there is an admin with the ability to some how resuscitate them like with Zack. ] Like someone else dying instead?

[armoured]

No, it's--

[He hesitates a long... long time, before steeling himself to go on.]

It's like my body, Zell, it's hollow. I lost my original one trying to bring my mother back.

[swatsflies]

[ Oh he just lost his body trying to bring his-

WHOA WAIT WHAT??? ]

What?! [ There is so much to ask or react to. Al doesn't have a body. That would explain SO MUCH. SO MUCH that he's also wondering why he didn't even guess. Then there is the whole how do you lose your body thing. ]

Where. Where did you lose your body? [ It's out before he can even think. Then he's kind of staring at the screen realizing how stupid that sounds. ]

[armoured]

[His voice is quieter, low and soft and sad.]

It's-- it's kind of a long story, are you sure you want to hear it?

[He knows he's started now, revealed the big secret, but he doesn't want to pile this on Zell without a warning for how heavy it is.]

[swatsflies]

[ Everything deflates at the sound of Al's voice. Rubbing the back of his neck feeling rather sheepish at his question and arguing in the first place as he gives a nod. ]

Yeah, I want to hear it. If you're cool with sharing it.

[armoured]

[There's a moment of silence, but he trusts Zell and it's incredibly important that he is made to understand that bringing people back isn't something to just charge into headlong.]

I was four when our Mom died, it was a sickness that swept across the country, it was so quick... Dad had already left and he didn't come back when Mom died, so it was just Brother and me. Our friend Winry and her Granny took us in, but it wasn't enough, we wanted our Mom back. We wanted her back so much...

[What idiots they had been.]

We'd already started practising alchemy, but human transmutation is something that's forbidden. Alchemy-- everything, is based on balance. Equivalent exchange, you can't make something from nothing, you have to give back an equal price. That's why making people was forbidden, there is no equivalent price, but we thought-- we thought maybe we could do it anyway. So we trained for a long time and researched everything we could find, and when I was ten we tried to bring her back.

We have all the ingredients for a human body, we thought if we added our own blood it would be soul data, but... but it went wrong. It wasn't enough, the price rebounded on us. Brother lost his leg and I lost my entire body, I would have died, but Ed gave up his arm to transmute my soul into this suit of armour and bind me to it.

[He hesitates, voice getting quieter.]

And even after all of that, what we made was barely even human. It was... broken, and bleeding, and it died again just a few seconds later.

We've met people since who can perform human transmutation using a philosopher's stone to bypass equivalent exchange, but those are made with human lives, using their souls for energy. I don't know if that's what's happening here, but I do know that people shouldn't come back from the dead, Zell, not ever.

[swatsflies]

[He doesn't have memories of that kind of loss, and they lost her to an illness. They had to watch her grow weaker and finally...

There is a sharp intake of breath as he gets to the part about Al losing his body and Ed loses both his limbs. And after all of that hell, what they brought back wasn't their mom. It wasn't even human. It sounds like some abomination they could run into here.

Muttering a curse under his breath as he remembers when Ed was asking questions about who brought him back. How distraught he sounded.

Brought my-- her back. I died.

The words never made sense to him, but they stuck to him because it was one of the first few messages he saw on the network. ]

Frickin' hell. Al. Al, I'm sorry. [ His voice is thick with emotion as he tries to focus on now. ]

[armoured]

It's okay.

[His voice is low and firm, not happy, but not distraught either.]

What we did was wrong, and I'll have to live with that forever, but that's not why I told you that. I told you because it's important to understand that just rushing in and trying to bring everyone back isn't smart, we don't know what's going on here and it's just-- it's not natural. I'm sorry.

Sorry. Had a kitty emergency. also sorry al

[swatsflies]

[ For a moment, he thinks about two people he knows that are here that should be dead. That were dying in their own world.

He makes a low sound that sums up his mixed feelings well. ]

I get you. [ Maybe. ] We'll find out what's happening here. Get to the center, kick some ass, and get the answers. Then. Then we'll know. [ That will make it better, right? If they find a reason for it. An explanation that would make everyone happy? ]

hope all is okay with the cat now

[armoured]

Yeah.

[He's not stupid, he knows that's not an agreement not to try and bring people back, but he's got better over the months he's been here in not forcing his views on others. Once they have the answers then Zell can make his decisions, and Al will make his.]

Believe me, I know what it's like to wish those people could come back all the same, even with the prices.

<3 it's getting bettter \o/ she's eating. thank you.

[swatsflies]

[ He will think about it at least, which might deter him from jumping at the chance to bring loved ones back. ]

Yeah, you lost a lot of people. [ And without really thinking about it ] You were here from pretty much the get go, huh?

[ So he lost all of those people as well. ]